Sunday, February 13, 2011

Wait before you Date

The right one
My own shooting star
That someone
Who won't break my heart
And I'll wait forever until we meet
You're one in a million
The right one for me..

That’s “The Right One” by Stellar Kart

Not many people started life like him.

He had tremendous potential.

But he was pretty impatient in trying to find his right one.

And yes, I'm talking about Samson.

Delilah was a part of Samson’s life for a short duration. Yet, she caused a catastrophic effect on his entire life. Samson could strangle a lion but he was as weak as a lamb in Delilah’s lap.

Delilah wasn't the right person for Samson because,

  • His relationship with her completely destroyed his relationship with God and with his family.
  • Her demands and need for attention showed no evidence for true love towards him.
  • She did not help to bring out the best in him. She took advantage of him four times. He did not understand her deceit even after she let him down so many times. Blinded by love, he fell prey to her schemes.
I know that you're giving me this look and saying, "Hey! I'm not like Samson and my valentine is definitely not a Delilah-kind-of-person. Our love is pure, it's been there for so many years now."

Well, that's great news.

But we need to understand that every good person and every spiritual friend is not necessarily the right person for us. Marriage has a unique purpose in our lives. It isn’t just about two ‘compatible’ individuals getting together. It’s about two unique people having a definite role to play in the destiny of each others’ lives.

My parents' are entirely different people, my dad is an introvert, my mom is an extrovert. My dad is intellectual, my mom is emotional. My dad thinks about the future, my mom makes a pleasant present. My dad invests on materials, my mom invests on relationships. Entirely different people, with entirely different aspirations.

But together, they make a great package. They fulfill their roles in each others' lives. They complement each other, fill each others' gaps and together they've built a balanced family.

Marriage is definitely about being happy together, but there's a bigger picture when God is writing your love story. You have a role to play in your partner's life, and that's what journeying together is all about.

That's why it is so important to be patient. Because it takes time to see things in God's perspective.

Love isn’t blind, rather it makes us blind. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not against ‘love marriages’ (really silly term we use in India, like other marriages are hate marriages or what??) or courtship. I'm just saying that you don't have to be in a hurry, stay close to God and allow him to direct you. The key to this is to stay patient and wait for your right one.

“Do not arouse love or awaken love until it so desires.” Song of Songs 8:4

There’s no hurry to let him know how you feel by this Valentine’s Day itself. Seeking God’s will is not asking for His approval for a decision you’ve already made, rather it is to surrender, and stay still.

Also, dare to break up from a relationship that wasn’t meant to be. It would definitely be hurting, but it’s worth the pain. Jesus understands us; he knows that we can get hyper-messy sometimes.

“For, I do not have a Master who is unable to sympathize with my weaknesses, but one who has been tempted in every way, just like me, but was without sin.” Hebrews 4:15

Talk to Him, surrender to Him, the key is to remain patient.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Callie